I cried when I read the email. At first I was ecstatic, pumping my fist, running around the room, because I couldn't contain myself, texting my husband to tell him the good news. My hero wanted me to work with them! The world felt complete.
Then slowly the excitement melted with the tears, and I puddled on my bed, just letting all the emotion out, good and bad.
I'd been holding on for so long, trying so hard to make something of myself. I threw everything I had into making my dreams come true and it had finally started to pay off.
It gave me hope. It made me believe that there IS a light at the end of the tunnel.
I wasn't just sitting back and waiting for my stars to align. I was actively pursuing my goals, learning everything I could, reading books the Master's wrote, reading their emails, vigorously notating every webinar and course. I put myself out there by blogging and posting on Medium. I rearranged my Pinterest board to look professional and to bring in subscribers.
I was buried in ideas and everything I needed to do right now so I could be successful. Writing novels is freaking hard, intensive work. Then editing is a monster, ripping novels apart to put them back together. Marketing and branding yourself is a whole other beast and I was trying to do it all.
I was constantly stressed out. I had post-it lists covering my home screen on my computer detailing what I still needed to get done. And I was trying to keep up, trying to market and write/edit. But it seemed like I was getting no where.
I had only two subscriptions come out of my Pinterest re-branding which rounded out my list at 11 total subscribers (most of which were friends and family).
I began to wonder what all this work was for. Was it even worth it to continue? Nothing was happening. In fact, I began to disbelieve so much, that I nearly gave up and shifted my focus from writing to art, determined that I'd try to make money that way.
Maybe you've been there. Maybe you are now. But what I learned when I was offered that job was that my hard work was paying off and that it just took time and consistancy for my efforts to work. I could make something of myself. Finally, that someone else had recognized my efforts and potential.
So, I cried because I was relieved, because I was humbled, and because I was good enough. I AM enough.
You are too.
I can attest to the hardships we face when trying to learn and apply all this knowledge. I've waded through suggestions and promising "How-To's" that are meant to sell Courses. (Not saying this is a bad thing, writers gotta make a living and this is how we do it. It just makes the whole process "pay to play," and leaves broke authors like me outside looking in, fumbling in the dark.)
Which is why I write these blog posts. To give you the insights I've been able to pick up through study. To share encouragement, because we could all use a boost sometimes. To fill in the knowledge gaps that you might have.
I know how difficult it is to be successful at your dreams. I've been there. So, when I tell you that you can make it through, I'm not just trying to make you feel better. I really believe that you can.
We're making it through little by little. Word by word, idea by idea, but we are making it.
If no one has told you recently, you are good enough. Your hard work isn't for nothing. Something great will come of it. And if you aren't where you want to be, you'll get there eventually. I believe.
And I'd like to help.
Shoot me an email and we can discuss the hardships of writing (I actually have a Free eBook that will help you with this) and marketing.